Wanna Help?

So, this morning's job search took a vastly different turn. In two short clicks, I found the United Nations Online Volunteering website (http://www.onlinevolunteering.org/) which doesn't get me a job, but offers hundreds of opportunities to assist a variety of organizations online. You can find something for your favourite social cause and just do a couple of works a week for anywhere from one day to indefinite.

So now it's time to get back to the work thing.

Unsent, rehashed...

Originally posted on Orkut...

Dear Kraft Peanut Butter 5/4/2004 1:06 PM

Thank you for lunch. It was lovely to see you and Kraft Strawberry
jelly so close.

You've made me very happy.

Sincerely,
SammichLover


Dear Time Magazine 5/4/2004 2:03 PM

I am writing to express my deep displeasure in not being named
Person of the Year yet again.

If you continue to ignore my obvious candidacy, I shall be forced
to unleash my megalomaniacal tendencies on the unsuspecting
world.

Sincerely,
Me

Happy Birfday to YOUS.

Wondering who "yous" is? It's the multiples of you in my life who share this very same birfday.

We'll start with the most important one to me, my lovely little niece Morgan, who turns a whopping 12 years old today! I still remember getting the news of her birth, and I remember the diaper-soiled little 1 year old who came to Yellowknife ahead of her parents. My one and only baby girl...a Pre-teen. *sigh*

HAPPY BIRFDAY MORGAN!

Beni (L) and Morgan (R) in Uncle Rod's Pajama Pants

Next up, is my Sister-in-Law, Marie, who is just a mere 6 months older than I am, and that's all I will say about how old she is, because it may not be polite to mention a woman's age these days ;) So...

HAPPY BIRFDAY MARIE!

Marie

Next up, are birfday shout outs to My friends Hugh and my former roommate Janet (and by extension, her twin brother), who are somewhere around my age, though slightly older, and whose pictures I don't have in digital format, so you'll have to imagine them or fall back on your memory of them :)

HAPPY BIRFDAY HUGH!

HAPPY BIRFDAY JANET (AND TWIN)!

Introducing....

Folks, from time to time, a little silliness must prevade this domain of Witticism and Wretched Observation, and tonight, I am reviving an old tradition to control the silliness. Once upon a time, I haunted a forum on Orkut called Fly Chicks for Geeky Guys. The name spells it out for you: Hot girls who dig geeky guys. This forum introduced me to some great people around the world, including Gail, and it introduced some interesting ideas into my world. The photo on my website (which is woefully unmaintained and in desperate need of content) comes from a Pictures of the Week thing where members of the forum had to take pictures of themselves taking a shower. There were some pretty hot pictures that week, but I took the prize for originality, being the only participant photographed fully clothed (can't give it all away on the first try, my reputation to the contrary). Well, another topic in the forum came to my attention, and it was a thread that I am proud to say that I excelled at. Without further ado, Introducing....

Open Letters!

Tonight, a concept is reborn in a new forum, and my imagination can run rampant! You see, the idea behind this concept is that the author can write letters to whom or whatever they see fit, and not to toot my own horn, but I wrote some real doozies in my day. The real tragedy is that I've long since forgotten my login name and password, otherwise I'd copy and paste some of them. But you get the idea all the same. I write letters to any and every thing I see fit to deserve them. Some will be serious, but let's face it, most will have you rolling your eyes or seriously questioning my fitness to participate in society at large without behavioural modification medication.

I won't be writing any letters tonight, but watch for them...they come as my muse is revealed, and I must obey.

B.C. = Bring Cash

Okay, first off, let me apologize for my language, but it's the most appropriate way to state what I'm about to say...

ICBC royally raped us up the ass today. Yes, we took the plunge and made our Thunderbunny a resident of B.C. today, and we learned a few things along the way:

1) Our car has been in B.C. before! Yes folks, it turns out that Thunderbunny was registered here before, which we didn't know, and I might add, it puzzled us greatly as to how a car from B.C. ended up having a block heater. Obviously, the previous owners either lived in a colder place here, or did us the favour of installing the block heater upon arrival in Alberta. Either way, a car in Vancouver with a block heater isn't a common sight, so I'm told.

2) Revelation time: Rod's got a terribly sketchy memory, and he apparently doesn't remember that it was in fact The Little Bitch (aka The Geo Metro) that got stolen and brought to Vancouver, not Thunderbunny. While his swiss-cheese-like memory is nothing new to us Rod Disciples, it hit me standing there staring at him in complete wonder that Rod would make a terrible witness in court for anything, because details...not so much. This could work to my advantage should I need to sue him for alimony or Lottery winnings, or put him in jail for attempting to murder me...

Me: "Rod promised he'd leave everything to me if he died, but the poor boy didn't get around to making a legal will."
Lawyer: "When was this promise made Ms. Poitras?"
Me: (picking any random date because I can get away with it) "November 3rd, sir."
Rod: (to himself) I don't remember this! I know, cause I remember everything. Except how old I am, how much I weigh, what colour underwear I'm wearing right now, the complete meaning of Pi, the size of the house I carried on my back for 5 km while hiking the West Coast trail in a garbage bag, the rules of accepting a bet where a key component is getting punched in the head, and where I put my watch this morning.

CASE CLOSED. I WIN.

3) ICBC is a scam. Our insurance went from being $91/month in Alberta to $167/month here. Same car, same driving records, same situational set up. And how do I know it's a scam? The difference in price for a policy that carries a 2 Million Dollar Liability claim on it, and a 1 Million Dollar claim on it is $4/month. But given the bad examples of driving I've witness in the short time we've been here, who's to quibble over $4 a month? All the same though, please pass the lube and the baby wipes.

I knew it would be expensive, but I had no idea it was going to be that bad. And just to clarify the picture for you, the best drivers with the longest records of no at fault claims get a maximum of 43% discounted on their insurance. I'm terrified to find out what the health care plan and the drug plan will end up costing us for Rod.

In the past I've made offers of vital organs to pay our debts, and no takers. Well, perhaps the more scientifically inclined or devilishly maniacal of you readers would consider buying my eggs instead. It would sure provide a steady income, and I won't be needing them. Even if I wanted brats, I can't afford them here!

Happy Mummy's day!

Today is Mother's Day, and it's time for us good, loving, devoted children to celebrate the Mother's who've loved us through the good and the bad. And my own mummy is no exception to this rule of celebration.

Mummy is having a tough time these days, as both the parents are sick with some sort of monster infection that just keeps clinging to them, but they are bearing up well. They both get to look forward to a trip to Toronto right away so Daddy could take part in a golf tournament he was invited to, and it'll be a nice getaway from the everyday.

My Mum is my best friend of course. Before I went back to work in July, we talked nearly everyday on the phone or by Messenger, about all kinds of things as trivial as what's going on on Y&R to the most complicated family issues. We help explain to each other the mysteries of the men in our lives. From the time I was a child, she's done so much for me. She's gone to the meetings for my activities, she bought me all kinds of things, she helped me learn to ride a bike, and so many more things.

Mummy, I love you!

8 days a week

Well folks, I've been here 8 days now, and I think it's been a pretty good week. We're 3/4 of the way through unpacking, though we're at a stand still at this point, due to laziness and boredom with the task, but I'm also discouraged that we've still not heard anything back from management about the storage locker situation, and I'm sick of looking at this stack of boxes and things I'd like to put somewhere.

We dealt with some banking stuff, and I'm pleased to announce that after 5 or so years of discussion, Rod and I have opened a joint Savings account (see? It does happen, it just takes longer with Rod), which I intend to manage like a hawk in preparation for the next big steps in life...home, cars, investments and retirement savings. We've started the process of transferring over all the car-related issues, having switched our Driver's club info over, and we're waiting on the paperwork from Alberta to get the insurance dealt with. The utilities are set up, the kitties are settling in quite well now, and I've got some hot leads on pilates studios in preparation for losing my newly gained 10 lbs. Yes, stress has not been kind to me...such is life I suppose, it's time to get serious about this whole health thing.

It occurred to me today that it was also time to get serious about something else...professional development. I write excellent academic papers, but I haven't had to write a report since high school. While academia is essentially how I'd be expected to form the majority of my communications in jobs that I'm interested in, I need to have the skills to sell my ideas in a concise, business-like manner if I'm going to keep said job. So guess what I'll be doing in September. And I'd like to take some personal interest classes too, in photography.

We have no friends out here, knowing only a handful of people, namely an elderly uncle of mine, and several family members and friends of Jette's (who are all eager to welcome her back to the Lower Mainland ASAP *hint hint*), and I'm going crazy here, wondering why we even bothered to sign up for a home phone number if the only ones planning on using it are Rod's family. It's time to get out, meet people, get a life, and dive headlong into this major shift I've brought us some 1100 kms away from our comfort zone for.

So, the current plan is this: A) Get a job to pay for said Life; B) Get said Life; C) be deliriously happy.

In the meantime, I know some of you have been clamouring for pictures, so here's a few teasers...

Our Living room/Workspace

Living Room/Workspace

A sliver of our Awesome View

Another sliver of the Awesome View

The Journey takes a pit stop

So let's see, where did I leave off? Tuesday I suppose. Well, on Tuesday, we got much packed, but still had quite a bit left, not including the stuff that I was planning to take because I needed it for my last few days in Edmonton. So...

Wednesday...

I went off to work with no lunch and no money, expecting Rod, Marc, and Jette to have packed Rod off by noon. So when I ran home to see if there was anything in the fridge for lunch, I was surprised to find them still there, working on the odds and ends. I once more kissed Rod off, and went back to work, and he got out of Edmonton around 2 with some very drowsy, unhappy kitties. Max hissed much of the time, despite his drugged condition. Spry little guy! After work, I went back to my empty apartment, had a mini-breakdown because it was really all happening, and then started to clean. I dragged almost everything left over to Jette's and then crashed for the night.

Thursday...

I went to work at the United Way for the last time, and only for the morning, as I was scheduled to work the National Conference that we were hosting from Thursday afternoon to Saturday evening. Barely anyone noticed I was leaving in all the chaos, which I supposed worked out well for me, because there were a few people I'd have preferred not having to deal with in my last few days. Off to the Conference around noon, where I was on my feet for the day, fake smiling and registering people. By the time that was all said and done, I was not in the mood to clean, plus, there was a very important night of television waiting for me, so I blew it off. Bad idea, but oh well.

Friday...

Conference work, this time, I'm supporting sessions by doing lackey work. But at least I got to be in the sessions and take part. Pretty interesting day in that respect. I had plans to go to the shooting range with Holly that evening, but when I got to my apartment, there were a few cleaning surprises waiting for me. Stuff like gooey red liquid on the bottom of the fridge and baked on grease and cake batter in the oven that I was unaware of. I had to put the plans with Holly off for Saturday and then spent 6 hours cleaning the apartment, emptying it of everything except phone books and a lint roller, so that 5 years of embedded cat hair could be dealt with by the next fellow (who was moving into our old apartment from Vancouver, ironically). Somewhere in the transportation process, I lost a full bag of frozen goods...very puzzling. Back to Jette's place to crash hardcore. Busy, very tiring day.

Saturday...

Back up and off to the Conference for more lackey work, but today was different. Great sessions, and I was done by 3:30, just in time to see my Red Wings lose Game 5 against the Oilers. Boo. Back to Jette's to pack up my things there in preparation for my journey on Sunday, but first, it's Girl's night out! It started with Holly and I making our trip to the Shooting Range at West Ed Mall, where we took turns with a 9mm, which I thought was awesome, but Holly was more frightened than anything. Given a gun to defend myself, I know I'm capable of some good shooting. Very cool. Then it was off to get ready for a Whyte night. We met up with Jette at Devlin's and headed for the Thirsty Turtle, catching the end of the cheap drink specials, and playing pool. We got crowded out of the pool table, so off to the Funky Buddha, where we stayed for only a few minutes, just enough time to have a shot, get cheeky with goofy drunk men, and run into my old friend Rachel, back from Europe in time for me to get her email address before I left town. Then we went to The One on Whyte, which wasn't really Holly's style of bar, being more of a meat market, but by then, who cared, it was about drinks and dancing! Lots of eye candy, Jette was hitting it off with some youngin's, it's all good. Then these guys are brought over to dance with us by girls who didn't want them, and Holly got slammed by one of the dicks, so we left. In the span of the 3 minutes it took us to leave, I got a stiffy rubbed up against me, and on the stairs on the way out, some guy walking in reached out and grabbed my crotch. I remembered why having Rod around could be a good thing, in spite of his White Men Can't Dance routine. Home to Jette's, where we stayed up and talked until 3:30...something told me I wasn't leaving at 8 am like I planned.

Sunday...

Oooooooooooh Sunday...Let's label Sunday "Failure to Launch." Woke up at 11:00, not entirely sober and not entirely human. I could barely stand the 5 minute drive over to my old apartment to drop off the keys, nevermind 12 hours on the highway. I stayed at Jette's and watched TV. We went out for greasy hamburgers, and back home for Sunday night TV. Hangovers are something I didn't miss during my 5 years of self-imposed sobriety.

Monday...

UP and out of Jette's before 8 am, stop for gas, stop for juice, and away I go. I pulled out onto the Yellowhead at 8:30, hit Jasper by 11 for a quick bite and a gas up, then off. The weather turned to shite immediately after crossing the border into BC, and stayed that way for about 200 kms. The annoying part about this drive is that it goes down to one lane highway upon entering Jasper National Park, all the way to McClure, just outside of Kamloops, so I was bored, impatient, and generally an asshole about passing slow drivers who probably considered their 110 KPH fast for the 100 KPH speed limits (I tend to like it more around the 135 KPH mark). Stop in Kamloops for more gas and a bathroom break. A little walk about around the Mall there, looking for a specific flavour of chips, but having no luck, it's back on the road to tackle the Coquihalla Highway. The road got wet between the junction outside of Kamloops and Merritt, then dry until about 15 minutes out of the Toll Booth. Then it was snowy and gross, but multiple lanes made the drive much better, despite the weather. I pulled into Burnaby, and up to my new front door 11h 32m after pulling out of the Petro-Can on Yellowhead. Damn, I'm good. Fuck that, I'm AWESOME. The rest of the night was TV and sleep.

Tuesday...

I wake up in my new digs, look out at my positively fantastic view of Mountains, city, lakes, and rivers, and I knew it was all worth it. We unpacked some, and went to Ikea to get a couple of shelves. Somehow we left an apartment of 800 sq ft in Edmonton for one of 775 sq ft here, and have more open space...weird. We got our phone, internet and cable set up, and life was good. Except for the Red Wings losing again and exciting the run for the Cup. I have more reasons to hate the Edmonton Oilers, and their rabid fans. Oh well, there's next year.

Wednesday...

More unpacking, it's becoming more like an apartment, less like a storage room in disarray. General malaise. It's good to be a bum.

And that brings us to this morning. I think it's more unpacking, and a trip to a couple of malls for today. And I need to find a Pilates studio, it's warm weather here, and I need to be in beach shape, since I now have easy access to a beach for the first time in 8 years. 8 years. That's just gross, and it's a big reason why I didn't care for Edmonton. Just as we were leaving, the City was discussing the idea of creating man-made beach spaces in the city. Too Late!

So, Welcome dear reader, to Burnaby. This ought to be good.