Friday, September 23, 2011

The Eulogy

As you know, I'm always trying to find myself; I lose myself in the damnedest the water's edge...a deep, personal music...Ottawa.  I know the way I do things doesn't make sense to a lot of people, which has led me to question how I appear to others, but when I tried to formulate an answer, I either despaired of the possible results, or I experienced confusion.  

One night, in yet another self-indulgent effort to sort this out, I began to draft something that some might find...well...creepy, depressing, or ghoulish.  I began to draft my own eulogy.  My mother would berate me if she knew, as if somehow superstition will overcome reality, and I'll actually bring about my death by tempting it with end of life considerations.  Anyway, minus the redacted bits to protect the identity of some people named, here is the draft product.  No doubt, it will be an evergreen exercise that will only end when I do...

It is announced with a mix of emotions that Fancy Christine Poitras has passed away.  Before passing, she took some time to reflect and write this eulogy, because she loved two things: irony, and having the last word.  Hard to know, but loving and loyal towards those who managed the task, Fancy will be remembered for her frankness, love of the Detroit Red Wings, and pride in her accomplishments.

Fancy was born on ____________, which would play a very significant role in her life to come.  She was the youngest child of ____ and _______ Poitras, and the baby sister of _________________, _____________, and ___________.  Meant to be born on her father’s birthday, Fancy took her time instead, putting the world on notice that she marched to her own beat, did things in her own time, and usually on her own terms.  Her mother kindly described her as ‘determined.’ 

It took many years for Fancy to express that pride in herself and her life; she was unsure of herself growing up, and lacked confidence, which was a stumbling block for her in important aspects of her life.  She went to three colleges and universities, and was registered in no less than 6 majors or programs before she found enough confidence to pursue her passion in social sciences.  She graduated from the University of Alberta in 2005 with a Bachelor of Arts degree in Political Science.  Not satisfied with that, she quickly moved on to Vancouver, where she enrolled in school again.  In 2007, she completed a Post-baccalaureate diploma in Social Policy Issues at Simon Fraser University, with an eye on a bigger goal; she applied and was accepted to the Master's of Public Policy program at Simon Fraser University in 2008, and completed her degree in 2010.  All of these accomplishments would not have been possible if not for her growth in confidence…she was finally comfortable in her skin. 

Fancy had a special gift for finding herself in unusual situations and strange positions; all too often, life had a way of happening to her.  Ever the trooper, she adapted to her circumstances, though not without substantial whining and complaining beforehand.  It was this knack for the unusual that taught her to grow up and take everything as a lesson.  For instance, she learned that it was a bad idea to go running downhill, directly into an oncoming bike going downhill…she never again run down into ditches when there was oncoming traffic, but she was able to proudly announce to anyone she met that she was likely the only person they had ever met who had been run over by a bicycle.

That knack for letting life happen to her that led her to Rodney, her first husband.  They met in 1998 when she moved into a room on Main Henday, a residence tower at the University of Alberta.  They remained friends until they began dating in 1999, and eventually married in 2008.  They divorced in 2010, but remained supportive, caring friends until death.  At the same time as the divorce, Fancy moved to Ottawa to embark on her career in Policy Analysis, where she began a relationship with Etienne shortly after her arrival.   ...

Fancy was conflicted, because she spent too much time thinking about everything, but there were some immutable truths which she stood by for life: family, first.  She loved her family deeply, and was very close to her mother, _______, and spoiled by her loving father, ____.  ...

In the end she finally concluded that there was something about her that was never meant to be understood, just loved.

So...*awkward silence*


At 8:57 PM, Blogger Gail at Large said...

I was just going to write about this very thing, but haven't had the time...

... but I was thinking more of an obituary than a eulogy. In either case, I was going to write about the idea of writing either (or both) not as fact but future and living up to that future. As specific as one likes -- goals, achievement, whatever.

Try it.


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