The Killers in concert

Well, way back in the beginning of this blogging adventure, I devoted a whole blog to the fact that I had actually bought a CD. I had bought 'Hot Fuss' by The Killers. So I was sooo excited when I heard they were coming to Edmonton for a concert. The first round of tickets sold out long before I ever had the chance to get at them, but a major venue change from Red's to the Shaw Conference Centre meant redemption, and this time I made good.

Tonight's adventure started with a 20 minute wait outside of the Shaw in the freezing rain/hale storm blowing over us. Oh lovely, it's now an all-ages show, meaning the city's teenagers, a group that already drives me nuts, are out in full force and are making me wish desperately that I could have my tubes tied right now.

We got in, and right off the bat headed for the merchandise booth. Huge error. They didn't organize anything for the merch booth, so 200 people were pushing, shoving, cramped, and squished. Scores of teenagers were eagerly thrusting forward to get their hands on hot pink t-shirts and studded belts with "The Killers" belt buckles, regardless of the fact that they were actually pushing the booth into the wall behind it.

We managed to get our t-shirts and escape relatively unscathed, though the fact was not lost on me that that crowd waiting around the souvenirs would be like a pedophile's wet dream...all that grabbing and rubbing in the name of "tight quarters", and I silently thanked my lucky stars that I was not a teenager anymore. We made our way into the hall to catch most of the set by Tegan and Sarah, the opening act. They are talented girls, but they suffer the same problem most opening acts do...shitty sound. Tegan's mic levels were too low, and I swear the girls were almost eating the mics sometimes instead of singing into them. It was nearly impossible to understand the lyrics, but all the same, they were an excellent choice to open the show.

I was quite ready for The Killers when they took the stage at 8:40, and they started with 'Jenny was a friend of mine', so I'm thinking all's cool. By the fourth song in, I realized that the band wasn't interacting at all with the audience. The set was fantastic, the lineup of songs was well-choosen, but Brandon (lead vocals/synthesizers) said almost nothing to the audience outside of occasionally announcing a song title. Now, I'm still a huge fan because they've got a sound that works for me, but I was truly unimpressed with this behaviour. At one point, I leaned over to Rod and shouted to him that I likened this concert to "Married Couple Sex"--brief, perfunctory, and very much the sense of 'Just get it over with'. If I was their label manager, I'd be worried because their showmanship skills are lacking. The concert ended just minutes before 10 pm.

Now, here's my quandry...how do I rate the show? The fact that they just played and buggered off is a huge mistake in my book, but the part that I pay to see...the real substance, the reason I go to shows, is to see talent. I measure the real abilities of a performer/band by their ability to sound similar to their album. To me, that means that they can actually carry a tune outside of a studio where they can be "fixed up." I have very little respect for so-called artists who use backup tracks during a show...I didn't pay my money to hear something I could have played at home on my stereo for free. And don't hand me any bullshit about needing them during heavy dance routines...if I wanted to see dance routines, I'd buy tickets to the ballet instead. Also, if broadway performers can master the duality of singing and dancing at the same time without the use of backup tracks, get off your millionaire lazyasses and learn already.

But I digress.

As I was saying, it's the sound that I base my judgements on, and The Killers sounded fantastic. Very similar to the album, but subtle enough changes in concert to show that it's a real voice, not tinned, piped-tracks.

I guess all I can say is that I eagerly await the next album, as they were performing tracks that aren't on the debut album, but I'll beware for the next time. Read the concert reviews, see if other shows are the same, or maybe this was just a really off night.

The little surprise

Since a lot of people don't actually get to see me that often, if ever, it's a good time to unveil the little secret I've been sitting on. No one else will care, but it's a pretty significant change for me, and since you all care about what happens to me (tries to imagine people *actually* caring)....or whatever, it's news-worthy. So I'll try to get it over with as quickly as possible to avoid the shock and awe because it's oh so exciting...

I cut off my hair.

For those of you who don't see me, you wouldn't know that until Friday at noon, my hair was half-way down my back. By 12:05 pm on Friday, it was, well, half-way down my head.

The clues were there in the cancer post...I said I had enough hair to donate. So tomorrow, I'll send off 11 inches of my hair to Vancouver, to a wigmaker that provides wigs to medical patients.

There. It's not bigger then a bread box (ed), it's got nothing to do with sex (chris), and it's nothing hugely significant, except to me, as I periodically whine, "Where's my hair?"

Rod responds, "In a plastic bag."

Sitting on a secret

Yes, that's right, I'm sitting on a little secret! Before anyone gets excited, No, I'm not engaged, pregnant or a lottery winner. I said *little* :)

I've already surprised Rod with it, but no one else knows, so not until tomorrow is it possible to reveal the secret here, because I've learned that people actually read this...not a lot, but they do.

When I get bored, things happen. Good things, bad things, just things.

Until next time...

Bumping into Reality

Things lately have had a busy, surreal quality to them, which has allowed me to hop, skip and jump away from reality for the time being. Well, today reality came slithering in.

Given that it's Breast Cancer Awareness month, it's something of a pink elephant in the room that no one's talking about. I'm being bombarded with the usual messages of caution and public service reminders to perform self examinations (which I do), and still it occurs to me that I wouldn't know the difference anyways. My breasts are fiberous and filled with lumps to begin with, and they are in a state of flux, so to speak. I have a general idea of where the lumps are, but they like to move around a bit to confuse me.

My Gramma (Paternal) had breast cancer, and just weeks after my birth, she went in for a mastectomy on one side. She had the other breast removed just a couple of months before she died, 23 years after the first operation. And as a general rule of thumb, as scary a prospect as this is, I tend to develop many of the health problems that plagued her. So, as you can imagine, I'm not very keen on the idea of someday being faced with the heart-wrenching prospect of developing Breast Cancer, and it has less to do with the idea of vanity than it does the chance that I could die.

Well, because my mind works in mysterious ways, immediately after the thought of losing my breast(s), I thought about my hair. Weird, I know, but stay with me, it will make sense. See, at this point, my hair is ridiculously long. It's halfway down my back, and it can be such a pain to have to deal with, but I keep it around for one sole purpose...cancer. At this point, I have long enough hair that I can chop off 10 inches safely to donate to an organization that supplies wigs to cancer patients.

Well, then I thought about education programs. As we are all aware, Breast cancer can afflict men as well, so I figure there should be blanket efforts to educate the public about self-exams. Women should know how to do them properly, and should be encouraged to do them regularly, because as we are learning in such unpleasant ways all the time, Ignorance kills.

Which then leads to the idea that people need to take responsibility for their health and wellbeing, and they need to be proactive, not only in prevention methods, but in treatments as well. Doctors and health care providers are certainly highly-trained specialists, but they are human, thus fallible for any number of reasons. I would be scared to death of the idea of leaving my health entirely in the hands of someone else.

And so on.

Anyways, the only reason I'm writing this long, rambling post is to remind everyone that support for the fight against Breast Cancer isn't just about money. All of the money in the world can't save a person who ignores reality. Encouraging self-awareness is what this is about. When we bump into reality, perhaps it will be less painful if we are aware of what we are up against.

BUT I DONWANNA!!!

Well folks. It's over. I have an unofficial Bachelor's degree as of 8:10 last night. It's sad really. I was so uncertain about whether I could actually pass this exam, but as the time drew nearer, I became very calm about it. I roughly sketched out where I was sitting in terms of percentage so far and determined that even a 50% on the final was enough to do the job just barely. Funny how that calmed me right down. And once I got into the exam and had a look, well, at first I had my doubts that I could do better than that 50% really, but a series of event unfolded that led to my confidence in passing the class:

First off, I had a look at the questions again, and actually saw things going on in my head that made sense. I don't mean made sense as in "I understand this stuff!" It was more like "well, what have I got to lose in trying?" Losing your inhibitions in the middle of a final might not work for some people, but MAN! I was feeling so good. I actually ended up doing enough questions to get part marks to give myself the cushion of allowing for other things to be wrong.

Second, about an hour and a half into the final, the prof realized that he hadn't actually taught us a concept as regards predicate logic that was the premise for completing a question on natural deductions, so he had to take the question off the exam, which took 5 points off the total, which meant that my cushion had just gotten a little cushier. That 5 points makes a *HUGE* difference to someone who's just scraping by to begin with, and when that question was cancelled, it was the weight of the world off my shoulders. Well hell! The exam was in the bag!

I finished what I could and after staring at the same question for 15 minutes and realizing that I was just not getting it, I packed up, strode up to the prof and turned that sucker in. I walked out and called Rod to come get me, and as I waited, I smiled inwardly about my success. Then it hit me.

I'm done.

I started post-secondary in September 1996, and have had quite a few hiccups along the way. Taking off the year and a half that I wasn't in school, I've been trying to complete a degree for 7 1/2 years. 9 years have passed since I started...9 years of my life. And now I'm done. So I did what anyone in my position would do.

I started to cry.

I had 2 personal accomplishments that I was prouder than hell about: I escaped the curse of an unfulfilled life in the North, and I found a love with Rod that has been the best thing to ever happen to me. Now I have 3 accomplishments. So why cry?

Because I'm not ready to go out and get some ho-hum job that *might* marginally touch on my career goals. I have to get the ball rolling on applying to grad schools because dammit, I just want better than everyone expects for me. Nothing wrong with wanting more. And I guess I was crying because my carefree days of studentdom are on hold while I get a job long enough to pay for the move to Vancouver.

I guess I'm not emotionally ready to graduate. I'm not ready to leave the U of A yet. I donwanna go out in the world yet. DONWANNA.

A joke gone terribly awry

I guess I should explain something that was posted here last week. The Poll. After talking to several people, I was sort of dismayed to find out that no one was taking it for the joke it really was. I really don't need help deciding what to do with my future, or at least I didn't until some folks made me question my own life choices in a negative way.

I don't know if I'm just particularly sensitive right now, but after hearing what was said, I was immediately hurt by what I perceived to be was a lack on confidence in my professional choices. Now, I'm not writing this to make people feel bad because quite frankly, they have just as much of a right to think/say it as I have to feel hurt by it, but we can't shy away from taking responsibility for our parts in the whole thing. I overestimated how the joke would go over, so I take responsibility for its being the catalyst, but by the same token, everyone needs to accept that my life choices are made between myself and Rod, meaning I know what's best for me, and I'm making informed decisions based on the options available to me. If people can't trust that, then what else about me are they not able to trust (Rhetorical question, do not answer)?

So I'm sorry that I put that joke out there. I had intended for lighthearted banter to be the primary consequence and not what actually happened.

Disqualified Canadian

I'm pretty sure that at any moment, the RCMP or CSIS, at the behest of the Conserative Party, will show up at my door to strip me of my Canadian credentials. As a Canadian Taxpayer (just barely) I should be outraged over the Sponsorship scandal. I should be furious at the Liberal Party over their apparent clientelism that led to missing money. I should be angry. But I'm not.

The absolute truth is that I could care less. Anyone who can show me an elected government that doesn't suffer from shady dealings is showing me a pretty picture coloured by a 3 year old. The drawbacks of election campaigning is that it requires a lot of money, and people never give money without expecting something in return. Jobs, kickbacks, lucrative contracts, whatever. Am I mad about the lack of transparency in Government? You bet your ass. Am I surprised by it? Get real.

Will I stop supporting the Liberals? No, despite my intense dislike and distrust of Paul Martin. Why hang in there? Because the fact is that I deplore the Conservatives for their narrowminded social agenda and desire to cut spending on Social Welfare. I hate that they encourage heavier reliance on Big Business, a sector that lacks absolutely any laws governing transparency. As for the NDP, their spendthrift ways and blatant opportunism puts me off. There's also an air of 'Holier-than-thou art' from ardent NDP supporters who look down on those who recognize a need for Public-Private partnerships to fill some gaps in services. Plus I can't stand Jack Layton, and I trust Stephen Harper about as far as I can throw him and his beady little eyes and tucked-in mouth.

Well, as for the sponsorship scandal, I was sick of it the minute it broke. I'm far too cynical to believe that any government is capable of remaining scandal free and demonstrating complete accountibility, so there's truly no hope of stirring my ire over this.

I wonder if forwarding this blog entry to the Conservative Party will stop them calling our house and asking us to vote Conservative. Hmmm....

Look! A Poll! A Poll!

Okay people...the ODDyssey from High School idiot to University Graduate has been long, trying, and laden with far too much soul-searching and epiphanies for a 26 year old. And it only continues:

I spent much of this morning online looking over many of the job sites to find myself an occupation until we move to Vancouver, and lo and behold...your dearest Fancy stands a better chance of winning the Nobel Peace Prize than she does of getting a job. Now, I know it's totally looking like "Oh look, another Bachelor of Arts grad finally gets it", but ironically, the perceived uselessness of a BA is *not* my problem. My problem is that I am now too overqualified for jobs I'd usually apply for because I have a BA, and I'm too underqualified for jobs I'd like to have because I have a BA.

With questions seriously looming that I could get into Grad school, I'm starting to wonder what my next move should be. To that end, I have decided to post a poll for my dear readers: I'm letting you have a say in my future (though results will not definitively determine what I will end up doing)!

POLL: what should Fancy do after Graduation this year?

1) Shut up and become a baby factory;
2) Continue her education in order to get a kick-ass job
3) Implement World Domination Plan, thus creating Kick-Ass job for herself;
4) Drop dead

Polling will remain open until Friday, April 8, 2005 at 11:59 pm. Votes can be taken at this site or via MSN Messenger. Employees of (namely Fancy) and family members (namely Max and Princess Purrball) of Fancy, Inc. are prohibited from voting. Voter must have minimum IQ of a gerbil to vote. Voters can only vote once. No purchase necessary.

Of Gods and Men

By now of course, there are few people left on earth who don't know that Pope John Paul II has died. I guess I'm far too cynical and pragmatic to be truly affected by this. To start with, I am an atheist, which sort of kills the romantic notions of faithfulness. I can't weep for the only pope I've ever known (John Paul II was elected just a mere 6 1/2 weeks before I was born), I can't wail. I can only really pay some heed to a good sort of man.

I disagreed strongly with his social conservatism as I felt that a celibate man really had no right to dictate to millions of people how to handle their private affairs, but I have to admire someone who's held on to his beliefs as strongly as I do to mine.

But with the pope's passing, there is a danger that a far more conservative pope could be elected out of the conclave, and that's a scary prospect. I think what got John Paul II so much fanfare was that he seemed like a genuinely likable guy, and people could sort of forgive his tough social agenda. Will the next pope have that kind of charisma? Could he yield the same results? We'll have to wait and see, though I'm not optimistic about this dramatic public shift towards Old Testament religiosity.

Why I miss New York

There are so many things about New York that I wouldn't want to deal with, but so many MORE things I wish I didn't have to leave. I guess since I've returned I've been thoroughly dissatisfied with Edmonton, which I know, is hard to believe considering I was such a huge Edmonton fan *tries to keep voice from dripping with sarcasm*

I know Times Square was not entirely that thrilling to me. It was the Las Vegas strip condensed...the lights were bright and the ads were larger than life and all I could think was, "Thank Gawd I don't have epilepsy!" I think the highlights of Times Square were the giant Toys R Us with the ferris wheel in it and the US Military recruiting station right smack in the middle of the roads that make up the intersection. I wonder how many tourists wander through with their cameras and stop and think, "You know, I just don't do enough for my country. I'm going to cut my tour short and get recruited!" But hey, to each their own.

I seriously *heart* Fifth Avenue though. I've never felt so poor and yet so at home. It's the Mothership ladies and gentlemen. Late one night 3 of the guys and I strolled down Fifth Avenue towards the Empire State Building and I had to explain the hierarchy of high fashion and jewellry to them. With an air of self-importance, I explained that the Penultimate jewellry store, Tiffany & Co. is beat only by Harry Winston in terms of quality and prestige, though I'm sure there are some who would argue for the more recognizible brand name. I ranked the designers and pointed out the pitfalls of haute couture. I felt fucking FABULOUS.

I don't know what to say about Ground Zero. I was upset, then I was *mad* as hell. I'd rather not get into it.

Canal street was a real treat. I just don't think I've ever seen such raw consumerism. It was raining and cold as hell, but everyone was in search of designer knockoffs and cheap goods, and the sidewalks were jammed with people asking me if I wanted to buy imitation Gucci. I just had a good old time watching the show.

I was visibly impressed with Columbia University and in particular, it's old Library building. It was a beautiful spring day and the sun was shining down on this campus, creating a brilliancy like I've never felt before on a University campus. The whole place just screamed 'Prestige' and 'Confidence.' But make no mistake about it: I neither aspire to attend that school, nor was I intimidated by those who do attend. It's simply a case of admiration, not envy.

The United Nations headquarters...this is where things get tricky. I truly admire the principles of the UN and aspire to represent them in my career, but knowing what I do about that building's less-than-inspiring structural faults, I feel some pity for those who work there. I mean no disrespect, but the UN is sorely in need of upgrading and redecorating. Nonetheless, I was awed by being there.

I Loved the taxis. I'm an agressive driver, so watching the taxi drivers swerve and honk and use the lines on the road as loose guides was hilarious.

What I saw of Central park on the south side by Columbus circle was nice and cliche. There was kids playing, people walking dogs, guys playing touch football, horses and buggies, etc. It was a unique experience wandering through this haven of nature surrounded by the madness of man.

What could I do without?
-high prices
-dirty sidewalks
-the Hilton New York
-the drama of travelling with a large group
and so on.

Next up...UAMUN goes to summer camp! :)