Thursday, October 14, 2004

The paper from hell

Yes, that's right. I'm working on that paper. Due tomorrow. At 2 pm. Well, it's not a hard paper to write, I just have no interest in writing it. It's more than half done, and never fear, I'll probably finish it within the hour, but still. This paper has caused more trouble than it's worth.

Rod and I have been exchanging biting comments back and forth all day, and everyone who knows about the paper has been after me to do it. I'm sorry, because I know you have my best interests at heart, but I operate best at the last minute. Without the intense pressure of a deadline looming near, I just don't get inspired to think clearly....let's simplify...if I know that the deadline is minutes away, I can articulate my arguments without cluttering them with a lot of unnecessary junk. It's my method, and it has never failed me (or I've never failed because of it).

Well, as if that wasn't enough, all day, the cats have been tag-teaming me, each taking their turns bothering me when I do try to write. It's irritating, and I ask Rod to help me out, which led to an argument. Well, he's gone to bed and in the morning, he will wake up not caring. Me? I'll fester and stew on it like I am now, and then I'll get the urge to shoot him in the ass at close range with a BB gun. It sucks. He told me he didn't like my meaningless conversation throughout the day. That's fine I guess. But it sure did hurt hearing that, and now I know that no matter how hard I try to let it go, it will bother me and I won't talk to him at all for the next week or so unless it's to convey something meaningful...whatever meaningful is. I'll try to be a grown-up about it, but in the end, I'll just feel a little stab of hurt everytime I want to talk to him but don't, because it could just be meaningless chatter. It's not spite, it's just what I have to do to avoid making things worse.

I'm so immature, but hey, I'm a girl. I guess the stereotype is that I'm bound to blow little things out of proportion or something. *In case you didn't get the intonation, that was sarcasm* Ahh fuck. This paper is more fucking trouble than it's worth.

PS. I swear. A lot. If you don't like it, sorry, but really, cussing is a very effective way to impart my feelings. Besides, better off swearing then relieving my anger in other (worse) ways, right?

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