Shhhhh! Be vewwy, vewwy quiet! I'm hunting Apawtments!

Aaaaaaaaaaand go!

I'm in Ottawa now, for the start of Apartment-hunting season. It's open season on all available clean, well-managed, pet-friendly bachelor and 1-bedroom suites under $1000 in the Downtown-Centretown, Golden Triangle and Sandy Hill areas!

My goal is to leave here with an application approved!

Let the hunt...begin! After a shower.

Excellent going-away gift suggestions...

For my friends, who sometimes need more that obvious hints (and I'm looking at you, Rod), I have supplied a list of potential going-away presents that would elicit joyful responses:

1) a copy of "Where the Wild Things Are" - the book, not the movie. I've wanted a copy for years and years...decades really, and have never received one. I've resisted buying one myself because I'd always hoped I'd get a copy in a more meaningful fashion.

2) A "Vancouver" picture or coffee table book. I am totally going to miss this city. 'nuff said.

3) Gift Cards for The Bay, Mexx, Femme de Carriere, Jacob, Chapters, HMV, RW & Co, Future Shop, Ikea, and Winners. I shop at these places, and I'm going to need to furnish the new apartment, have things to entertain me on those long, cold, Ottawa winter nights, and be on the lookout for professional work attire :)

4) A Bescherelle. Otherwise known as a French Grammar book.

5) A map book of Ottawa-Gatineau.

6) A backpack. The kind to get me around Europe. I'm not going on some self-exploratory journey where I will find a deeper meaning to my life or anything...just going to see some sites and party as a foreigner :)

7) Both albums by The Fratellis...that shit is awesome. period.

8) A map book of Montreal. I'm going to memorize that city!

9) a Plane ticket back to Vancouver for June :) I'll finally get to convocate in front of my dad!

10) A piece of Vancouver!

Change, change, change, change...

Do you ever put a song on repeat, and listen to it for hours, so the point that its every note is burned into your brain?

I do sometimes. And tonight, it's "L.E.S. Artists" by Santogold. The video is odd, but the lyrics...repeating "I can say I hope it will be worth what I give up, if I can stand up mean for the things that I believe" over and over...they speak to my current state of mind.



This isn't just about Rod, though I know he's a very large part of it. I'm just weeks away from leaping into the unknown. I've moving to a new city, where I will be alone, into a new job in a new subject area. I'm leaving school, Vancouver, my family and friends, everything that I've cultivated over the past 4 years. And it's scary as hell, but like Santogold says, "I can say I hope it will be worth what I give up, if I can stand up mean for the things that I believe." At this point, I have to believe that all these changes will be worthwhile. It's going to be a tough act to follow...good and wonderful things happened during the chapter I'm finishing...I have to hope good and wonderful things await me in this new chapter.

Oh, the people you will "meet"

This 'meeting people' business has already proven to be one of the most interesting experiences I've had in a while. Yes, I'm on an online dating website (no, I won't say which one), and I'm looking to meet people in Ottawa. It's not about the dating part, though if it gets there with someone, I won't say no; it's about meeting people and making connections and even friends. All due respect to my Ottawa friends, but I need to meet more people in Ottawa!

The problem, which I foresaw, is that you have to wade through some real characters to get to any real gems. And this weekend, just as I was contemplating leaving the site for a while, I got some REAL characters.

This weekend alone, I've been invited to "get together" with 3 guys, all around closing time in Ottawa. This does not surprise me, and I'm amused by it. There's no mistaking their meaning. The messages go something like, "Hi, how are you tonight? I'm drunk, lonely and horny. Wanna come over (or Where do you live)?" I laugh to myself as I respond "Good luck with that. I'm in Vancouver." Guys don't read my profile, they see knee stockings and want a booty call! Oh well. But the reason I'm laughing is because I have to wonder if their lameass lines actually ever work? And if you took the time to read my profile, you'd see I'm an educated woman with no self-esteem issues that would drive me to answer "Okay!" to these pitiful attempts at booty calls. This pretty well deterred two of them. But the third decided he really wanted to keep things going, and without any further encouragement, he's asked me if I could please wear my Halloween costume when I go to his house.

But this is not even close to the prize-winner of the weekend. A simple "Hi, how are you?" exchange with one guy led almost instantly to a proposition of a different kind: he asked me if I ever considered selling a pair of my panties. My WTF-o-meter instantly went off the chart, and I was just *dying* to know what this was about, so I said it was something that's never crossed my mind, honestly. He responded that I am an extremely attractive and desirable woman, and he'd pay well for a pair.

This is essentially the lowest level of sex work possible, and it's somewhat common in the world of fetishism. The client requests something that often does not even require physical contact, merely that some fetish they engage in be fulfilled (think Sex and the City, and the episode involving Charlotte and the shoe salesman). This particular request does not bother me from my own perspective as a purveyor, I have nothing to fear when it comes to my personal safety. A person with a no-contact fetish is typically harmless.

But, having had some education in so-called aberrant behaviours, the part that does both me is the aspect of exploitation of a fetishist. If I was so inclined, this would be an opportunity for me to exploit this person's willingness to pay with little cost to myself. This shifts the balance of power away from equal footing, toward favouring me. On the other hand, is it really exploitation if this is truly what the client desires?

I'm never sure what to think. After reading a Dan Savage column a few weeks ago regarding a similar situation, I thought, "well, if it's not causing harm to either client or provider, there's nothing wrong with it." But at the time, I never thought I would be in a situation where I myself am being asked to engage in this type of low-level sex work. The control imposed by society tells me it is wrong to engage. The Libertarian streak in me says 'Who cares?'

Anyone else have an opinion?

...And the Winner is...

ME!

This morning, after a fretful sleep during which I apparently bit my lip so hard it split on the inside, I went to school in a panic. I had no class this morning, no group meeting, or any other typical reason for why you might assume I'd be at school on a Monday morning. What I had, was my Capstone thesis defence.

After spending this weekend scurrying to get my capstone to the examiner, as well as putting together a powerpoint presentation for the defence, I was mortified to find out that our printer was out of ink and dirty anyway. How was I going to print my materials for the defence??

So I was up super early at 6:30 am (after going to bed at 2 am) because my defence was scheduled for 9 am, and I needed to go to school to print stuff. Except when I got there, the faculty offices door was still lock, and the library and computer labs were still closed...at 8:30 on a Monday morning?? What?? And the panic was starting to set in as the minutes ticked by and I had to be downstairs to set up.

Thankfully, Christine a 1st/2nd year student arrived and had enough printing credits for our student printer in the Grad room, and I was able to print all 98 pages of my capstone and my 7 speaking notes pages...I threw $10 at her in gratitude, for something that should have cost just a smidge over $5, and bolted downstairs with 5 minutes to spare.

My examiner showed up, but my supervisor was 15 minutes late! And...GO!

Did I mention that the first time I mock defended my capstone, my presentation was shite, and I spent much of last night revising it entirely? No? Yeah, well, my mock defence presentation was shite and I revised nearly the whole thing last night. AND IT WORKED!

My supervisor was very pleased with my presentation and has asked me to send her my slides so she can give them to future students as a template. As for the defence itself, I wasn't surprised by most of the comments and questions, and in the end, I have was are considered minor revisions (stuff about explaining and expanding on subjects), no major flawholes in my project...I revise in 3 or 4 days, turn it over to Nancy, wait for the final okay, and then I ship it off to the printer and the Library!

For serious, dear reader...it's been a long, at times bitter ride to get to this point. I've been working through illnesses, a painful (but amicable) breakdown of my marriage, the problems my marriage breakdown created for my relationship with my parents, traveling back and forth to Ottawa, a cousin's death, the Olympics madness, my brother's illness, and a host of other problems. My supervisor has never seen so much happen to a single student in the program in one school year, never mind the fact that I still came out swinging. I had my moments of weakness, and I'm entitled to them, but in the end, I was determined to win. And that, I did!

Fancy C. Poitras, BA, PBD, MPP (unofficial)...stay tuned...at some point, I'll forget all the madness I've endured, and start applying to PhD programs! But for now at least...it's nap time :)

Policy Problem

Saskatchewan chief feels responsible after boy found dead, mauled by dogs

This is an issue I dealt with this summer in INAC, and I can tell you for certain two things: a lot of these dogs on reserves are semi-feral, and according to INAC policy, it is the reserve's responsibility to find the resources to deal with the matters.

What about those reserves that don't have the financial resources to manage the dog populations? Not to mention that the solution adopted frequently, the cull, is controversial, not just with animal rights people, but also on the reserves as well. Maybe it's time INAC address partnerships to deal with this issue. A more humane solution is to conduct periodic spay and neutering programs on reserves, but it's an expensive option. Hey, first years...I smell a potential capstone...

And if I'm going to get fired before I'm hired for saying so, it's their loss.