What else don't I know?

This afternoon, dear reader, my illusions were shattered. My House of Cards crumpled, as I confronted a picture of a smiling, cherub little face I'd never seen before, and learned the sordid details of the lie I'd unwittingly been living for the past 25 years...

I've been to Las Vegas.

Please! I had no way of knowing this! I was under the impression that my first decade's travels in the United States were restricted solely to California, I had no way of knowing! It's not like it came up very often, the trip to the State(s) I took with Mummy when I was but a wee cherub of two and a half!

The Picture in question is a giant black and white picture of me grinning in that cute, blindly trusting way two year olds do. I swear, I've never seen that picture at any time in my conscious memory, but there is was on Mummy's Webcam. Then the news that left me wondering just what about my life I don't know...the picture had been taken in front of Circus Circus. My heart raced as I asked Mum to confirm to me what Circus Circus was, and she breezily did so, blithely sending me into a tailspin I will never recover from. I've been to Vegas.

And so all of my illusions of the grandeur of sweeping into Las Vegas for my elopement, and gazing on it's breathtaking hedonism for the first time before getting very drunk and letting a man in a drive-thru window pronouce Rod and I husband and wife, have all been washed away and I'm left with the bittersweet memory of what was to have been...my first time in Vegas.

Please people, for the love of yourselves and all you hold dear...find out who you really are, where you've really been. Don't end up like me, a broken shell of my former self.

It's like I don't even know me.