Thursday, May 08, 2008

The Blurred line between Reality and Boredom

Well folks, two weeks ago today, I made my way to the clinic and purposely put myself through an informed practice of mutilation-cum-improvement. I walked into the surgical suite blind, and after a dazzling array of psychadelically-coloured starburst (and the disturbing smell of singed flesh), I walked out of that surgical suite...blind.

After you get PRK laser surgery done, they stick these "bandage" contact lenses in your eyes that you have to wear for about a week, and they hand you a large shaving kit with about 150,000 items in it for post-op care...use the drops with the blue dot at these times, the green dot at these times with the yellow dots at the same times, etc. And they also provide these drops, ominously marked with a red dot, that when applied, sting like you want to die, and then numb your eyes to the pain...such incredible contradiction in one tiny drop. Oh, and did I mention that with all these drops, the bandage lenses WILL get all cloudy and blurry?

Well, as it turns out, I'm a slow healer. I was excited to have the lenses removed, only to find out that I needed fresh ones for a couple more days. Yay...but it's only 3 more days. 3 days later....well, one came out, and another fresh lens went into the right eye...dammit! But this time, I was allowed to rip that sucker out on Monday night before bed, all by myself. I'm currently without lens, and stuck in some strange netherworld where I can see for the first time in years, but not really.

I highly recommend it to anyone who has the patience and time to spend healing.

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