Slowly put down the Facebook, and back away...

There comes a time when people have had enough.  For some, the build-up is gradual, starting out as accepting, tolerant, even happy about change, but then becoming more disillusioned with the pace and/or type of change.  For others, the reaction is almost instantaneous, and they pull the rip cord early, not wanting to be a part of what follows.  Friends...after 5+ years together, I am bugging out on Facebook. 

It's been great finding some old friends, keeping up with new ones, and it's been awkward watching events unfold in the lives of some.  But it's not new anymore, and people don't have the same enthusiasm that they once did.  I can't think of the last time I was invited to an event sent out by friends that *wasn't* a craft fair, promotional nightclub party, or social justice event.  I don't need to get into how I feel about invites to Farmville or Bejeweled.  And I'm tired of being told by companies to "Like" something or join them on Facebook for special deals.

People are just making shit up, forming groups, and others are joining because they are amused by the name, such as this group:

"I'm selfish, impatient and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I am out of control and at times hard to handle. But if you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best." — Marilyn Monroe

People don't interact here.  They just like the page title.   

Facebook has undergone likely dozens of iterations in the last five years that I've been on it (to say nothing of those who have been on since 2004), and it seems that the changes they are constantly making are creating a type of superficial social interaction at best.  "So-and-so likes Lamp."  And then we all as friends decide...do we "like" their post?  Do we comment, "LOL, nice"?  And that's what qualifies as "keeping up with friends" in the Facebook universe?

Does anyone remember when you actually had to write a status update, and people wrote back on your wall?  How often these days do we even visit the walls of our friends?  We just see what goes on in our feeds.

With the latest round of updates that Facebook has done, we know have a little sidebar telling us what our friends are doing, right beside the live feed which tells us what our friends have been doing.  We have reached a stage where we have a Facebook on our Facebook page.

The dozens of iterations have me thinking that the nice people at Facebook have short attention spans, and they seem intent on creating a space that encourages it as well.  I liked some of the early changes, but lately, it's just become such a big drama.  Privacy this, security that, picture-viewers, blah blah blah...


I'm taking my business to Twitter.

The Eulogy

As you know, I'm always trying to find myself; I lose myself in the damnedest places...by the water's edge...a deep, personal experience...in music...Ottawa.  I know the way I do things doesn't make sense to a lot of people, which has led me to question how I appear to others, but when I tried to formulate an answer, I either despaired of the possible results, or I experienced confusion.  

One night, in yet another self-indulgent effort to sort this out, I began to draft something that some might find...well...creepy, depressing, or ghoulish.  I began to draft my own eulogy.  My mother would berate me if she knew, as if somehow superstition will overcome reality, and I'll actually bring about my death by tempting it with end of life considerations.  Anyway, minus the redacted bits to protect the identity of some people named, here is the draft product.  No doubt, it will be an evergreen exercise that will only end when I do...

It is announced with a mix of emotions that Fancy Christine Poitras has passed away.  Before passing, she took some time to reflect and write this eulogy, because she loved two things: irony, and having the last word.  Hard to know, but loving and loyal towards those who managed the task, Fancy will be remembered for her frankness, love of the Detroit Red Wings, and pride in her accomplishments.

Fancy was born on ____________, which would play a very significant role in her life to come.  She was the youngest child of ____ and _______ Poitras, and the baby sister of _________________, _____________, and ___________.  Meant to be born on her father’s birthday, Fancy took her time instead, putting the world on notice that she marched to her own beat, did things in her own time, and usually on her own terms.  Her mother kindly described her as ‘determined.’ 

It took many years for Fancy to express that pride in herself and her life; she was unsure of herself growing up, and lacked confidence, which was a stumbling block for her in important aspects of her life.  She went to three colleges and universities, and was registered in no less than 6 majors or programs before she found enough confidence to pursue her passion in social sciences.  She graduated from the University of Alberta in 2005 with a Bachelor of Arts degree in Political Science.  Not satisfied with that, she quickly moved on to Vancouver, where she enrolled in school again.  In 2007, she completed a Post-baccalaureate diploma in Social Policy Issues at Simon Fraser University, with an eye on a bigger goal; she applied and was accepted to the Master's of Public Policy program at Simon Fraser University in 2008, and completed her degree in 2010.  All of these accomplishments would not have been possible if not for her growth in confidence…she was finally comfortable in her skin. 

Fancy had a special gift for finding herself in unusual situations and strange positions; all too often, life had a way of happening to her.  Ever the trooper, she adapted to her circumstances, though not without substantial whining and complaining beforehand.  It was this knack for the unusual that taught her to grow up and take everything as a lesson.  For instance, she learned that it was a bad idea to go running downhill, directly into an oncoming bike going downhill…she never again run down into ditches when there was oncoming traffic, but she was able to proudly announce to anyone she met that she was likely the only person they had ever met who had been run over by a bicycle.

That knack for letting life happen to her that led her to Rodney, her first husband.  They met in 1998 when she moved into a room on Main Henday, a residence tower at the University of Alberta.  They remained friends until they began dating in 1999, and eventually married in 2008.  They divorced in 2010, but remained supportive, caring friends until death.  At the same time as the divorce, Fancy moved to Ottawa to embark on her career in Policy Analysis, where she began a relationship with Etienne shortly after her arrival.   ...

Fancy was conflicted, because she spent too much time thinking about everything, but there were some immutable truths which she stood by for life: family, first.  She loved her family deeply, and was very close to her mother, _______, and spoiled by her loving father, ____.  ...

In the end she finally concluded that there was something about her that was never meant to be understood, just loved.

So...*awkward silence*