Saturday, December 19, 2009

Pop Psychology

Toward the end of Grade 11, my English teacher pulled out a bit of fun for us that was really un-English related; he had us pull out a sheet of paper and asked us five questions. We were to write down our answers to these questions.

1. What is your favourite wild animal and why?
2. What is your favourite domesticated animal and why?
3. Scenario: you are on a beach. It's night time, and the star is filled with stars and a soft moon, and the waves are crashing. There's a gentle breeze, but it's warm. How do you feel?
4. Scenario: you are in a white room, filled with white light. Everything is white. How do you feel?
5. What is your favourite food and why?

Well, we eagerly took to this task, because it was obviously not school or homework. And 14.5 years later, I still remember my answers:

1. Chinchillas because they are wild and cheeky
2. Chinchillas because they are soft and cheeky
3. I feel calm, at peace.
4. I feel dead.
5. Steak, because it's hot, thick and juicy, and it lasts so damn long.

And then came the joke; this was one of those fun little pop psychology quizzes where each question means something, and how you respond means something. Now, the embarrassing part is that the teacher asked us to share our answers for a question, and then he told us what the questions/responses meant. I was doing alright until the last question.

1. Your favourite wild animal and its qualities symbolizes how you want people to see you.
Alright...not bad.

2. Your favourite domesticated animal and its qualities symbolize how people actually see you.
Okay, so the cheeky thing is a reality, I get it.

3. How you feel about the night beach scene symbolizes how you see life.
Alright, mentally well-adjusted answer! Bonus!

4. How you feel about the all-white scenario symbolizes how you feel about marriage.
Oh...loss of bonus points. Uhh...do-over?

5. Your favourite food and why symbolizes what you think about sex.
FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK! DO OVER! DO OVER!

Pop psychology is a sham!

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